The goal for my week has been—walk! Walk straight, walk upright, walk further than I thought I could.
We have enjoyed watching our newest grandson learn to walk this past year. For a while, we were amused by his not wanting to walk. And then he learned to do something that was interesting to me and also something that I had never seen before. He did learn to walk—on his knees. It was so different to me that I had to google knee walking. Sure enough, other little kids also do knee walking. And while I thought it unusual, soon he did decide to trust his feet and start to walk on his feet, in fact he enjoyed the speediness of walking on his two feet so much that he turned a lot of his walking into running. It was about that same time that I was finding my own walking becoming nearly impossible due to the pain that I was experiencing. To compensate for the pain, I developed some bad walking habits. I needed to move about by leaning on something that I could use to take the pressure off the painful joint— furniture surf and to use a walker. I learned to walk by dragging the leg that was so painful. I learned to endure the pain by doing things that I could sit down to do and stay in one place. I let others do the moving for me and bring to me the things that I needed while sitting at my table. After months of learning these new habits and getting them ingrained in me, now I am having trouble with my bad habits.
So, how long does it take to get rid of a bad habit? Some say that realistically, a person will take anywhere from 18 to over 250 days to break a habit completely. This amount of time can vary from person to person. To break a habit, a person should set realistic goals, know why you want to break the habit, and identify triggers. In my case, I want to walk normally again. I want to stop depending on walking aids. I want to stop walking looking like a goose or penguin. My goal is to do that as soon as I can and I hope it doesn't take me at least 250 days to change how I walk! And it is pretty easy to know what makes me walk like a penguin. I have feared falling for so long that the fear is still with me, even if it is subconscious. So, I sway from side to side and become a penguin!
The interesting thing is I can walk normally when I am using a walker on a short walk from room to room in the house or a store or the church. I can almost walk normally, though slow, when I use a cane. But if I take a long walk with a walker, then I want to lean on it, but perhaps that is because I get too tired! I am out of shape and need to build up my walking muscles and back muscles and many other muscles that haven't been used for so long. When I try to do without an aid, then the bad habits take over.
When it comes to walking without aids, I fail! I want to walk in a chimpanzee-like kind of slouch form—it is hard to remember to stand up straight. I have to try hard to remember to stand up tall like a giraffe! I shuffle like I'm walking on an icy sidewalk. Someone said that I shuffle like a porcupine. I need to take proper steps pointing my toes in the direction I want to go. My feeling of uncertainty of safety makes me want to take small steps that are not normal. I definitely have bad walking habits. Many of my “helpers” have pointed out what I am doing wrong and what I need to change. I like the help but then these bad habits of mine are so hard to change. I feel defeated and a little guilty because I know better and still can't seem to make consistent changes that I have to do to make the change happen permanently. The cycle of not walking properly is understandable, because the brain doesn't make changes easily. But breaking an unhealthy habit can be done. It takes intent, a little white-knuckling, and some effective behavior modification techniques.
One way to kick bad habits is to actively replace unhealthy routines with new, healthy ones. Some people find they can replace a bad habit, even drug addiction, with another behavior, like exercising. I am finding that I cannot expect the changes to just happen, I have to think hard about what I want to do differently. It requires me to put in effort to change even the smallest wrong way I have been walking and use the correct form.
This concentration on unlearning the wrong way to walk has led to thinking about walking in general. I remember long walks with my father when we were on vacations to places he had dreamed of seeing. He wanted to see the places in a different way than many ever do. And I was the one to accompany him. We went places that my mother would not have wanted either of us to go. Later, I watched others go for hikes and I stayed behind to be with my father and mother who could no longer walk with the family group. I do not regret staying with them. But when I was able to go hiking again, I could not keep up with the walkers. I had become too slow, and many wanted to surge ahead. I have been thankful for those who remembered that I had become a slow walker and chose to stay with me. There are also days to remember of when our own boys learned to walk. So often each boy had a time of holding my hand as we walked. The hand-in-hand walk was not only a loving way to walk, it was also a safety matter. We walked hand-in-hand to keep the child safe from traffic and edges of cliffs and from getting lost. It reminded me of how God always walks with us no matter how long it takes us to get to where He wants us to be. No matter how slow I am, God lets me take my time. He doesn’t rush me, nor does he leave me behind. I walk with God and He walks with me. He keeps me safe, keeps me out of the way of trouble, keeps me from falling over the cliff's edge of sin. I like to think we walk hand-in-hand.
The figurative use of the word "walk" in the Bible refers to the way in which an individual lives or conducts his or her life; and regularly, the Christian's walk will be in stark contrast to that of the unbeliever's walk. I like the picture of Enoch walking hand-in-hand with God until one day, they walked together, right on into Heaven! Walking with God makes things possible, even though life on earth may be difficult. It gives assurance of God's presence and power, and the joy and peace that come from the relationship with God and outweigh the cost of following Jesus.
Before starting a new day, always take time to remember your destination, why you are walking, and with whom you are walking. This helps you keep in step with the Spirit.
Walking implies continuance, and Christians should always be with Christ, treading in His steps, and doing His will.
Walking faithfully--Micah 4:5 states, “We will walk in the name of the Lord our God forever and ever”.
We are not intended to take our journey alone, and we can learn the value of accepting a mentor who will walk life with us.
Walking with humility--Micah 6:6-8 states, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall”.
Is there a blessing of walking with God? When we walk with God, we are living together with our Lord. We feel God's delight in all things good, and we sense his pain in the face of our sin and evil. Such a close walk with God is itself a blessing. The joy and peace that flow from a relationship with God far outweighs the cost of being a follower of Jesus Christ.
"As we stretch our legs and stand upright and straight to walk, we also stretch our minds and our souls. St. Augustine, a great walker, remarked, "Solvitur ambulando; it is solved by walking." For me, that has not happened. I am too focused on the method of walking and keeping track of how many steps I have walked and the distance I have traveled. A goal was set for me of walking a mile 6 weeks after surgery. I have not met that goal yet. While a mile might seem short to some, after not walking for so long, to me a mile seems incredibly impossible. So many times, we set goals of walking with God every day. And then we slouch and shuffle and falter and fall short of our goals.
It should not be surprising that the Bible uses walking as a symbol for a person's way of life, including their beliefs, attitudes, desires, and actions. This metaphor is especially prominent in wisdom contexts, which often present a contrast between two different ways of walking/living (e.g., Ps 1:1–6 ; Prov 4:10–19 ).
Blessed is the one
who does not walk in step with the wicked
or stand in the way that sinners take
or sit in the company of mockers,
2 but whose delight is in the law of the Lord,
and who meditates on his law day and night.
3 That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
whatever they do prospers.
4 Not so the wicked!
They are like chaff
that the wind blows away.
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment,
nor sinners in the assembly of the righteous.
6 For the Lord watches over the way of the righteous,
but the way of the wicked leads to destruction.
Versus
Listen, my son, accept what I say,
and the years of your life will be many.
11 I instruct you in the way of wisdom
and lead you along straight paths.
12 When you walk, your steps will not be hampered;
when you run, you will not stumble.
13 Hold on to instruction, do not let it go;
guard it well, for it is your life.
14 Do not set foot on the path of the wicked
or walk in the way of evildoers.
15 Avoid it, do not travel on it;
turn from it and go on your way.
16 For they cannot rest until they do evil;
they are robbed of sleep till they make someone stumble.
17 They eat the bread of wickedness
and drink the wine of violence.
18 The path of the righteous is like the morning sun,
shining ever brighter till the full light of day.
19 But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness;
they do not know what makes them stumble.
When we walk with God, we live together with our Lord. We feel God's delight in all things good, and we sense his pain in the face of sin and evil. Such a close walk with God is itself a blessing. The joy and peace that flow from our relationship with God far outweigh the cost of being a follower of Jesus Christ.
I’m learning everyday how to walk—with God!